so today I was told I was stupid and to go kill myself on four different occasions by four different people all because I poured too much water into a beaker.
could someone please explain to me how that is human? how can you sit there and tell that to a girl who has scars on her arms and that they’ve obviously seen because they’ve asked me about it or stared at them or something.
how can you sit there and tell someone to kill themselves!? even as a joke. it’s not funny. it’s serious. people die everyday. every fucking day because someone says “go kill yourself” and the person does it. that was their last straw.

all I’m saying is this world is seriously FUCKED UP.

so usually every Tuesday my dad and I got racquet balling at our local gym and everything is great but we can’t go tomorrow so we were gonna go today. twenty minutes before we were gonna leave to go my mom informs us we can’t go because I didn’t finish my homework. I’ve told her I could care less about anything at school. I’ve told her how much I want to fucking die and racquet ball is really helpful but no I have to stay home. she makes me want to cut so badly. and while it may seem like such a small thing it’s huge to me. I’m not even fucking doing homework right now! I have no reason to! I want to fucking die. take my razor and cut deep enough to where I don’t stop bleeding. I don’t want to deal with this bullshit anymore. I’m tired of living life. I don’t care about what’s going to happen for me later in life. I don’t want to find out. I want to stop living now. it’s not like anyone would miss me anyways.